Tuesday, July 30, 2013

He Heals Me.....

I told him my biggest secret
And he told me four
He smiled at me and said
That makes me love you more

And then he made me laugh
And I knew it was a sign
That he was a man
That I wanted in my life

And with every passing day
I feel more and more of that way

He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me
He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me
He heals me, he heals me

I can play him songs all through the night
And he will listen to every line
And even when I'm wrong, he is still kind
He chooses his words wisely
When he tells me I'm not right

And yes, he is a beautiful man
But he is also a beautiful friend

He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me, no
He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me
He heals me, he heals me

The moment that we met, he made me smile
He has so much compassion in his eyes
I have no idea, how long he'll be here
A season or a lifetime, forever or a year

But for the first time in my life
I'm not worried about the future
Because we have such
A wonderful time when we're together

However things turn out, it's all right
'Cause he's already changed my life

He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me
He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me

He heals me, he knows the real me
And he accepts me, he never hurts me
He heals me, he heals me
He never hurts me, he heals me....

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Draupadi, An Ikon of a True Indian Woman

India has produced many a great men and many a great women. Sita became the role model in India. Every father wants to see Sita in his daughter and every husband wants to see Sita in his wife. Why did Draupadi not become a role model? A better question might be if Draupadi should be the role model for the modern women? I am not trying to make the point that Sita should not be the role model. The point is should women have another role model to look up to. While Sita is an ideal wife to an ideal husband who could the women of today, who do not have the perfect and ideal husband, look up to as a role model.
If we realize that fear is deep rooted in the female kind especially that of the Indian women, then we can understand why many of the atrocities are committed against these women by ordinary men. The point I am trying to emphasize here is that women need to look up to someone who took a firm stand in tough times. This can then give women the courage to believe in themselves enough to say that sometimes it is o.k. to take a stand. Draupadi is one such woman who while doing all her rightful duties is willing and bold enough to take a stand. Draupadi actually declared a war with the Kauravas long before it really happened in the battlefield of Kurukshetra. Draupadi in ancient times said that it is sometimes o.k. for women to take a stand.

Duryodhana humiliated Draupadi in front of the five Pandava brothers and in front of many well-known dignitaries of those times on an open platform. Yudhisthir was challenged to play poker; he lost everything and in the end pawned Draupadi. There may be a lot of controversy whether or not he should have done it or not, but what followed was beyond belief. In front of every one in the open house, Dushashana (Duryodhana’s brother) held Draupadi by her hair and dragged her in. Duryodhana indicated Draupadi to sit in his lap. And, more despicably, they tried to disrobe her to nudity. Draupadi surrendered herself to Krishna for help and Krishna did help her such that the Kauravas failed in their misadventure. And then Draupadi vows that she would not wash her hair until she first washes them with the blood of Dushashana and Duryodhana. This is nothing short of declaring a war. Duryodhana is not going to cut his thigh himself to donate blood for Draupadi to wash her hairs.

This stand taken by Draupadi is so significant. In the scene described above, Draupadi actually won. She could have smiled at Duryodhana and said, “Well tried, try again.” They had failed miserably in trying to disrobe her. Kauravas had lost and Pandavas were full of shame. What Draupadi did was not so much for herself, but more so for the whole female kind. She is saying to the Kauravas not to mess with females as a whole. She is saying to the entire female world to take an appropriate stand. She did not go and confer with her husbands, or her brothers or even Krishna. She knew exactly what she had to do. She takes the stand, and the pieces of the rest of the puzzle fall together later. She must have thought that if Duryodhana can attempt such an insult and humiliation of Draupadi, what will he do to ordinary women.

We should not compare great men or women, but there is a need to understand the three most powerful women in Indian history, Sita, Radha and Draupadi. Sita is a powerful woman; she comes in the family of an enlightened King, Janaka. She actually is said to appear from the earth while some one was sloughing the field. This may be true literally or may not be. But, it definitely symbolizes what Sita’s temperament is going to be. She is representing the properties of the mother earth. She will be nourishing to every one and will not have complaints. She has the strength; She can bear anything. While she is young, she moves the bow by her hand easily; Ravana could not move the same bow later in the story. Ravana abducts her to Lanka but is scared to touch her.

Sita was no ordinary woman. But, she did not need to do what Draupadi had to. She did not need to take a stand. This has to be understood deeply. She is married to Rama, an avatar of Parmatma. It is not an accident that Sita is married to Rama. She is totally surrendered to the Parmatma. Once you surrender to the Parmatma, it is now Parmatma’s responsibility to see things through. Who are you to take a stand? Who are you to question his judgments? In reality, once you surrender, there is no one to take a stand and there is no one to ask questions. Sita is surrendering and Rama is a conformist.

Krishna and Radha is a different story. Radha is happy with her unconditional love to Krishna. Krishna is a rebel. He is willing to break rules; he helps Arjuna to take Subhadra against the wishes and accepted social norms of the time. He has no problem dancing with Radha

Sita is wife of Rama and Radha is in love with Krishna. Both are surrendered to Parmatma. Now, it is Parmatma’s responsibility to take the life further. Draupadi is a different story. She is human and is dealing with human husbands, not one but five of them. One husband can do several mistakes. You can imagine what will happen if the mistakes are multiplied by five. Draupadi is also surrendered to Parmatma, and the Parmatma (Krishna) helps her as a sister every time she needs help. But, she is married to five extra-ordinary yet human beings. They have their weak and strong points too.

Draupadi is the one out of the three who is closer to the times of today. She deserves the attention of the modern women. Draupadi was born out of the Vedi of a Yajna; from the sacred fire. This may not be true literally, but is significant. It is symbolic of the fact that it indicates what the temperament of Draupadi is going to be like. She is not going to be passive woman. She will be fiery. She is not going to tolerate injustice. She will be brilliant and have the properties of purity and purification. Moreover, anyone that touches fire gets burnt. Fire is not that forgiving. Every one who tried to touch Draupadi with ulterior motives got burnt. This happened to Duryodhana, Dushashana and Jayadratha.

These properties are reflected in Draupadi’s character throughout her life with the Pandavas. She had a discussion with Yudhisthir when they were in the forest when she talks as if she does not believe in God. And, then Yudhisthir gives her this nice lecture on how not to reach to conclusions too soon about Parmatma. What follows from Draupadi is so beautiful. She says very clearly that she does believe in Dharma and Parmatma completely, but she will continue to complain anyway. She also talks about the importance of karma yoga. It takes a very deep Shradha (Trust) to be able to say that. I believe in Parmatma so completely that I can complain to him as well. Her trust in Parmatma is obvious by the fact that Krishna appears every time she remembers him.

Again, Satyabhama once comes to Draupadi in the jungle and asks Draupadi the tricks, mantras and yantras that Draupadi might be using to keep the trust of her husbands. Again what Draupadi says to Satyabhama should be read by every women of today. She almost feels offended by the question and advises Satybhama to never use such tricks. They never work; mostly they work against you and are matters of superstition. Draupadi then goes on to say how she stays away from jealousy, and does not do things merely to impress and so on. These are the gems of Mahabharata that should be the object of study by every man and women.

Draupadi is often criticized for her marriage to five brothers. There are few things that should be understood about this point.
  1. Draupadi's marriage: It was not Draupadi's choice to marry five brothers. She had just come with the Pandava brothers. Arjuna had won the championship and she had put the garland in his neck. As far as she was concerned she was marrying one of the brothers, Arjuna. I would say that it was a great sacrifice on her part to accept the wishes of the mother Kunti and her sons to marry and carry the marriage faithfully up to the end.
  2. Again, who really knows if Kunti was really sleepy when the Pandava brothers came back home with Draupadi. It was not an ordinary event. Draupadi was so beautiful and full of radiating energy. I have a feeling that Kunti knew that if Arjuna alone married Draupadi there could be trouble in the family. Kunti might have asked for the marriage in her full senses and all the brothers not only agreed to it, but also were very happy with the decision..
Even if we accept this criticism of Draupadi, we still have to give credit to Draupadi for putting up with five husbands and taking up a stand when honor of a woman was at stake. I must point out that Draupadi did not leave the Pandava brothers after the insult by Duryodhana. She continued her role as a wife and was with them through the hard times in the Jungle and every other place. She maintained her stand all the time. Making a role model of Draupadi is not without problems Draupadi declared the war with Kauravas long before it actually happened. She continued her role as a wife with the five brothers. Her forces were working behind the scenes and one day the war did happen. In some ways, she upheld the honor of women for all times.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Not All Relations Have Names

There he stood, facing a desert,
A teenager, robbed of happiness and shattered.
He was down, yet had to wear a smile,
“Many of my friends need to see me joyous and cheerful.”
Some untold pain, some uncovered sorrow,
Gnawed at him, but he had few before whom he could vent his emotions.
A day he will well remember,
It was when he met her,
A young girl, may be just another friend in his life?
But she was different…her grace and silent beauty,
They made her someone special.
Those comforting eyes, that soothing voice,
The cheering smile, that calm presence,
He knew, he had found the Lady…
She might not be his Dream Girl,
But she was his Princess.
Days passed, the bonding grew…
He unfurled, like never before…
For in her company, he found Life!
She helped him to be happy,
Reminded him of his own philosophies,
Stood by him, encouraging the dying soul to live on….
He offered her his own self,
His most prized possession,
They shared each-other,
With an eternal promise, “For you, I shall always be there.”
Irrespective of time, and also of space,
They both knew, that in heart,
There shall always remain the other’s impression.
He never knew, when all the colors of his life,
Intended to paint her picture.
In getting close, in taking support, he had crossed all boundaries.
A day without her seemed too painful.
Her smiling face, his constant companion.
He knew that he shall be lying to himself,
If, after all this, he called them, just friends.
Confused and worried,
Not sure, how the world will take this Emotional Attachment,
He looked up at God, and asked the Omniscient,
“What shall I call her? Who shall she be to me?”
His creator gave him a serene smile,
“Not all Relations have Names.”

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

The Time We Spent Together

From the day we met,
I knew there was something special about you,
Something that made me feel special inside,
Feeling my heart filled with joy whenever we were together,
missing you whenever you were gone,

It's because of you that I was able to grow as a person,
it's because of you that I was able to discover things about myself that I never would've realized on my own,
You make me a better person just by being you,
knowing that i could always talk to you whenever I needed help,

Although a bit saddened wishing I could do the same for you,
As it seems I've brought pain and adversity various times during our friendship.
 I can't take back what happened nor can I ever make up for it,
However, I just hope you'll believe me when I say that I'll always be there if you need me.

I promise no matter what happens in my life, I'll always be there for you,

Even though I may not always have the answers, that still won't stop me from trying my best to help you.
In my heart, you'll always be one of my closest friends,
I feel very lucky that I met an angel like you,
as you truly made me a better person, and I hope someday I can repay you.

Saturday, April 23, 2011


He cried almost silently,
And slowly. A tear would fill his eye,
Drop to a cheek, quiver trembling for an endless eternity,
And fall to the ground.
And then he'd start again, perhaps punctuated by a gasping breath
His arms wrapped tightly around himself, not allowing anyone near.

I sit, helpless, aching for his pain,
But unwilling and unable to find the words to ease him
By taking the blame, yet again...
Unwilling, for fear of trapping myself within his circle of sadness.
And so stay, we two, tensely balanced,
Somewhere between despair and despair,
Perhaps this is our only solution.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Women really liberated?????

I wanna ask all those people who get judgmental about a women who smokes, drinks and goes out with friends, if India still looks down upon us for doing all of this, then why do we really blow the trumpet of liberation and empowerment. 

When we talk of women liberation, we should look at our society. Even a man is not liberated in our society. Liberation is the independence to take own decisions for career, partner and lifestyle. Women are definitely can't take these decisions freely in our society but can man do that. Other than some families in metro, I guess no. they still have to go by their parent's decision considering caste for marriage.  If you stop a girl from going out with friends, enjoying herself, and being comfortable with the society, how on earth can you expect her to be open and liberated in her thoughts.This not only applies to women, but to anyone living on the planet. The important thing to have liberal thoughts is intent, and the other is the scope/opportunity. People today (men and women included) are becoming more interested in having an opinion and belief about their surroundings, society.

In today’s world where women/ girls work as much and sometimes more than their counterpart males ,their way of dressing up, entertainment, social interaction, language and life styles have changed drastically. If any girl (daughter) wants to work till late hours, sometimes in different cities or countries parents feel proud and boast about it everywhere. Don't parents proudly tell how good their daughter is in her work, how well she is earning but when it comes to lifestyle changes, they call it hip culture and try to prevent her rushing into it, rubbishing the entire attitude;  she must believe in Indian values. Losing virginity before marriage is a complete no, no...... that is a gift she must preserve for her husband. I am sorry it doesn’t work that way. With education, demands from prospective brides are high too....they don’t want to cook and clean or stand attendance to in laws. They want their partners to be equally committed in return. Virginity like any other attribute asks for same from the males too. It’s no more like males could demand a virgin wife and have a mistress tucked away somewhere else.  Since females are in competition in every field, they don't lag behind in this field too...... if males can enjoy sexual gratification before marriage then why should females  preserve virginity?
Whether it is right or wrong I shall come to that later on but I must say we can't have double standards. Sexual urges are same in both sexes and with marriage age slowly shifting from teenage years to late twenties or even thirties what are females supposed to do? There is a difference in thinking of a thirty five year girl from a twenty five year one. Last few years have brought on great divide because girls are living independently away from parents who normally kept an eye on them previously. These girls are competitive in every field; sex is just one more aspect of this changing life. Male mindset perhaps is still stuck up on virginity. We must not forget Indian values favor men more than women and that is the reason they want to stick to it. No doubt dowry, bride burning is still rampant in many parts of the country. Middle class girls still have to tow the traditional line. There are certain questions raised in my mind for a man who wants a woman to be liberal. Will you marry a woman after premarital sex? will a boy ever want a liberal girl to be his wife? many of the answers will be no......Males on the other hand want modern and hip girls as girlfriends and traditional females as wives. sometimes they want both rolled into one. It suits their purpose. 

Till the time we allow people (especially women) to have the security of expressing themselves, it would not be feasible to have a society with liberated women and a prosperous society..... 

Thursday, March 31, 2011


This is a letter for a special person, a letter expressing my feelings for this special person. who, in one way or another gave me everything he has, and still loving me just the way I'm...

From the very moment that I was so LONELY, SAD and ALONE came the man who start changing my LIFE. He is like an angel come rushing at my side, whom ever wanted is to comfort me and stay as long as I want him too.First I was so eager to get away from him,knowing that he will also hurt me like what others do to women like me.I was then thankful that God had given me the chance to meet a person like him, full of passion,Love, Care,willingness and patience. Having him in my life makes everyday a living grace. Loving him is an important element in my present reason why I still live with hope and faith. I was so lucky for I always have him in good terms or in bad. He became my inspiration, he makes me remember how to SMILE while under pressure. He pulls me up whenever I'm down and make me strong when I'm weak and hopeless. I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as 'making a life.' 'I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back...' 'I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.' 'I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.' 'I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel......'. I  always remind him that I'm the most SELFISH woman he will meet. If I'll be given the chance to go back to my past I will always choose the DAY that i met him. And that I will always take the path where he is and in return, of all the love, sufferings and sacrifices he had encountered being with me, I will never regret that I loved him and still Falling for him.Well, this present DAY of our relationship, We are getting stronger and he is  reason why I continue Writing.He taught me to forgive and start all over again to ease the pain and scars I gain from my past. With his love and my family's I can go on and reach for my dreams and soar high!! .

thanx alot buddy........!!!